Mens Rea
by Cookirini
Summary: At the end of one's life, all crimes are judged, and punishment is given. As one soldier drifts in between life and death, her willpower drained by fear, she is faced with a crime she never realized she had committed. Anime based.


"Neptune!"

That was the last word she heard before she fell. Everything became hazy, blue and red mingling in black within Marine Cathedral, before all became black underneath her closed eyes. She couldn't hear Uranus shouting, nor could she hear Eudial laughing as her heart crystal came out, revealing the power within.

Even that power faded to nothing as she slipped into nothingness.

There was nothing for her but pain. Death was pain, she realized. It was the act of one's soul being ripped out of one's chest, the feeling of the body being ripped apart by an unnatural force. It was nothing like Naptune had ever felt before. It was the feeling of chains around her soul, dragging her down into the abyss.

It was the smell of rotting meat and garbage being waved under her nose.

Michiru's eyes suddenly bolted open.

"HAAH-!"

The high walls of Marine Cathedral was gone; there was no Uranus, no Eudial, no guns, no organs, no stained glass, no sunset. It was all replaced by black stone, the cold hard steel of the floor, the searing heat of fire that came from a tiny barred window which gave the room its only light.

"Where..."

Michiru's voice echoed through the chamber as she looked down at herself. Her transformation had somehow dissolved; she was dressed in a white dress, similar to one of her favorite concert dresses. However, it was ripped and torn to the point where it ceased to be a dress and was merely some dangling cloth which barely covered her naked body. It was stained with blood and dirt, and smelled so disgusting that Michiru's eyes almost rolled to the back of her head at the stench.

_Where...am I..._

"**AWAKE!**"

Michiru gasped as a door, invisible before, suddenly flung open with a reounding bang. Normally, Michiru would have stood up and demanded what was going on. However, something was missing within Michiru, and she could not place what. Instead, she crawled away from the door, shiverring as her unprotected back hit the cold wall.

"Aaah." A figure cloaked in black, imposing and rasping, filled the doorway, a flaming red baby dragon yipping on its shoulder. "The newcomer. Kaiou Michiru. I have your lunch."  
"Where..." Michiru's nose crinkled, for the figure also smelled. "Where...am I..."  
"You should eat this up." Motioning at the bowl, Michiru could see something moving in it, even at her angle. "It may be the last meal you ever have."  
"What..." Michiru's eyes widened. "What do you mean!"  
"What do I mean?"

There was a silence as the figure stared at Michiru for a moment, not saying a word. The longer the silence continued, the more helpless, the more scred, the more powerless Michiru felt. Something was not right with herself; she could feel the ominous waves of the sea, even from wherever she was, coursing away from her in terror.

"...What do I mean." The figure suddenly laughed harshly, the dragon squawking with it. "You're in transit, that's what I mean."  
"In transit..."  
"Near death." The figure snorted haughtily. "You'll be dead soon enough, though, sailor. You've been signed in, and most people who're signed in, don't get signed out, know what I mean?"  
"Then I..."  
"You're dense, aren't you? You've been signed onto the registry of the King of Hell. You're on the list, toots." The baby dragon on the figure's cloak looked hungrily at Michiru's legs. "As a new arrival to the underworld, you've been summoned to the Court of Fengdu to answer for your earthly crimes - and boy are you in for a surprise. Your arraignment is in one hour."  
"But I-"  
"Now, take this and eat your food." The voice became annoyed. "I don't slave over this crap for nothing."  
"I'm..." Michiru's chest felt cold and empty. "I'm not hungry..."  
"That was _not_ a request!" The figure's head suddenly burst into flame in anger at Michiru's refusal. "EAT it, you miserable bitch!"  
"Leave me alone!"

Instead of responding, the disgusting concoction was thrown at Michiru's feet by the figure. The dragon gave an angry howl at Michiru's refusal, beating its wings. The figure, however, stopped the dragon from acting, and merely turned to walk out of the cell.

"Enjoy eternity."

With that, the door slammed shut with an ominous bass. Laughter suddenly echoed into the cell, the joke obviously on Michiru and her lunch.

_This is a dream..._

Michiru shivered as giant maggots suddenly crawled out of the grub and onto her leg. Half a foot wide, the fat visibly wriggled underneath the yellowed skin as the bugs began to nip eagerly at Michiru's flesh. She gave a squeal of terror, her sense of calm and dignity being quickly drained by the forces of death that held her in its grip.

_This is a dream...just a dream...I'll wake up...I must...I...must...wake up..._

-

"All rise!"

The entire courtroom - filled with the souls of the demonic host - stood up in unison as the bailiff - a red-skinned man with horns coming from his head, bellowed. The seats were made of crushed skeleton bones, the bench made of blackened steel. In the center of the room was a ring of fire, from which sprung a defendant cage with spikes turned inward.

"The Honorable Izunami-Yama the Great, judge of the hells of Retribution, Torture, Punishment and the Avici, where the worst crimes are punished." At these words, a red-hooded creature materialized on the judge's bench in a burst of flames. "Be seated!"  
"Thank you, bailiff Satan." Raising the gavel - which was a hammer with steel nails coming out of one end - the judge pointed to two massive iron doors. "Bring the defendant forth!"

At this, the swung open ominously, the clanging sound echoing over and over. Three masked figures then dragged Michiru, sharp thorns cuffing her hands and bite marks covering her legs, into the room and pushed her into the center cage.

"Ugh!"

Michiru barely missed hitting one of the nails within the cage, and she collapsed to the floor. Dazed, confused, bleeding from her hands, she looked around, her body tensing each moment her eyes stayed open. Everywhere she turned, there was nothing but the gleam of iron glaring back menacingly.

"Your Honor, here is the defendant." She heard the raspy whisper behind her. "We are ready."  
"Good. The defendant will not stand up and face the court." After the girl refused to rise, the voice of the judge boomed into her head with a loud roar. "**_STAND_**!"

Without a moment to spare, Michiru carefully got herself up off the ground without scratching herself, in compliance to the order. She could see the nails were sharper than even the best made _katana_. One wrong move and her body could easily have been cut in half.

The view standing up wasn't much better. The walls were transparent, each side showing a various scene, like stain-glass windows. On her left, there were naked female figures, tied to iron beds while giant nails drove into their bodies; on her right, women figures were chased by giants with swords and pitchforks that were longer than Mack trucks, and their eyes were raked out. In the back, she could hear the sounds of boiling oil, followed by the dropping of flesh into the concoction. She remembered this from her studies with her grandfather, long ago, when they went to the Buddhist temple together. The more she thought of it, the more helpless she felt; she knew full well that hell was designed to break anyone's soul, and unfortunately, it was working all too well on Michiru.

The worst, however, was behind the bench, where all three tortures were used simultaneously. There was also a giant black furnace at the very top, which Michiru could see very easily as people were forced into it. She could hear the screams and wails from all four sides echo into the chamber, and she shuddered violently.

"Kaiou Michiru." Her attention was turned back to the red-cloaked figure, whose voice sounded like hissing snakes. "Also known as the sailor soldier of the planetary entity Neptune. Currently in transit between spiritual planes. You have been summoned to the court of the netherworld to answer to charges brought against you."  
"Charges..."  
"You have been charged by karmic decree with murder, attempted murder, and crimes against humanity. The penalty for these crimes is eternal damnation within the Avici hell." The courtroom murmured. "How do you plead to this charge?"  
"Crimes against humanity?" Michiru's heart froze. "Murder? How is...but I haven't killed anyone..."  
"Answer to the charges!" The hissing snakes returned. "How do you plead!"  
"I'm innocent." Michiru looked around frantically, her mind reeling from shock. "I know I'm innocent! I've never killed anyone in my life!"  
"And of attempted murder?"  
"Attempted..." Michiru shook her head. "I didn't attempt to murder anyone, either. Any action that may have been construed that way...I did it to-"  
"Sire," At this, the red-faced bailiff spoke. "We have the party that is pressing the charges waiting to be seen in."  
"Very well." The judge pointed towards the back. "You are declaring yourself innocent, and the party who is bringing the charges have claimed aggrieved status. Bring them in!"

At this, the doors opened once more, and two more shrouded figures came in. Unlike the others present, however, both wore white scarves around their necks, though the taller one also had a red scarf tangled around the white one.

"You..."  
"Kaiou Michiru."

At this, the two newcomers took their hoods off. The taller one Michiru did not recognize; she was a woman in her thirties, her brown hair loosely tied up in a bun. Her eyes were dark, and they seemed to exude anger as they looked upon the green-haired girl.

The second figure, however, was a boy, and even with the lifelessness in his eyes it only took a few seconds to recognize who he was.

"Oh my god..."

_"Don't touch it!"  
"Michiru?"  
"Deep Submerge!"  
"Sailor Neptune...why?" _

"Next time, I'll kill him..."

"I see you know them." The judge's voice came through the memories of Michiru's battles, one of her very first, and deepest rooted memories. "Litigant, state you name and registry!"  
"I am...Takomaki Aiko." The woman's voice was low, a calm tone before the shrieking storm. "I am here to avenge the deaths of myself and my son, Takeshi, at the hands of Kaiou-san. I come from Nakana to plead my case."  
"Tell the court your story, Takomaki-san."  
"It started six months ago..."

Either it was the words of the angry woman, or it was the atmosphere of fear that gripped the courtroom. Perhaps it was both things influencing Michiru's mind. Whatever it was, her memories of that day were returning more vividly than they ever had before.

"My son came out of school and he never came home. It was midnight by the time I was informed by the police that they had found my son's body inside a mechanic's garage, and he had been taken into intensive care for massive internal injuries. He suffered so much damage that he convulsed violently for three hours before falling into a coma. He died an hour after, and all this happened right in front of my eyes. Even now, in the afterworld, the depth of his injuries has damaged his soul and sealed his ability to speak and think!"  
"Go on."  
"I was so distraught - he was my only child, my baby. Nothing could replace him. All I thought about was joining him, and because I went insane from grief, that's what I did. I took a knife and slit my wrists, so two lives were lost." The woman pointed at Michiru. "But when I came to the netherworld, I researched all I could about my son's attack, as he was unable to. I learned that Kaiou-san - this woman, a sailor soldier, who is supposed to uphold the virtues of humanity - had used her planetary powers against my son. She even said, after she attacked him, that the next time she saw him she'd kill him. But she didn't have to because she had _already_ killed him!"  
"Hmm."  
"She has also said that she'd sacrifice herself to save the world, but in reality, she is a lair. Many times passed where she could have _truly_ risked her life. Yet while my innocent son died, she still lived, and said later that she and her partner would also sacrifice anyone and everyone for her so-called mission!"

There was another murmur, louder than the first, as the woman's voice became a shriek. Obviously annoyed at the noise, the judge quickly banged their gavel down onto the bench. The room was suddenly subjected to the noise of a thousand shrieking crows, and the ground shook violently.

"Order!"

Michiru took a step back in shock, and as she did, she felt the prick of a nail on her elbow. She jumped, and the nail took off a small chunk of skin as she did so.

"Ah!"  
"I won't let her do what she did to me and my son to anyone else!" As Michiru held her arm in pain, quaking in fear, Takomaki frantically looked up at the judge. "Your Honor, send this woman to the Avici hell that sits behind your bench and punish her for what she's done to us!"  
"Your story is disturbing, to say the least," the judge looked down at Michiru, their eyes glowing red as they spoke, "and murder is an unforgivable crime in hell. That a girl her age also spoke on the record that she would subject others to such an attack is deplorable. Your pain is obviously justified, Takamaki-san. Kaiou Michiru, do you have anything to say to justify your actions?"

A hush fell over the crowd as the courtroom awaited the sailor soldier's response. Shivering, Michiru looked at the judge, then at her accuser, then at the child. She could not see emotion in the boy's eyes; it was as if he was unable to feel it.

_All my fault..._

"I..." Michiru shut her eyes. "..._No_! I didn't mean to kill him."  
"You _did_!"  
"That's not true!" Michiru shook her head violently. "I _swear_! Not that time. He had been turned into a daimon...he was attacking my partner...I didn't know what else to do. I had to attack him. But he wasn't human at that point...he was a daimon. He was going to ravage Tokyo if he got out."  
"Daimon..."  
"The daimons extract heart crystals from people, and a lack of a heart crystal is fatal after a certain amount of time. When heart crystals are extracted by the enemy, my partner and I would examine them. But we give them back because none of them had a talisman! We return their lives back to them, I swear!"

Tears fell from Takomaki's eyes as Michiru spoke, and a slight snarl formed on her lips. Instinctively, she drew her son closer to her, as if to shield him from the sailor soldier's blandishments.

"I...never killed anyone intentionally." Michiru opened her eyes and looked down. "And the only people I would ever think to kill would be those who held a talisman, if it had to be that way. But getting the talismans is the only way to save the world. And...and...if there is one person who has so far died from having a talisman extracted from their body, by my actions...it is me."

There was a slight gasp from the figures who sat in the courtroom at this. The judge took up the gavel again, but by the time there was an opportunity to use it, the crowd became completely silent. Michiru did not notice; she did not care. All she could see was the Avici hell waiting for her entrance, even as she desperately attempted to justify herself.

"I didn't know." A single tear fell from her eyes. "I thought I was dirty for believing sacrifice was the only way to save the world. But I never thought _I_ would hold such a sacred item as a talisman. How could I...with the sins I've committed, with what I've now done to my lover and Takoma-"  
"Enough."

Michiru stopped at the sound of the hissing snakes. She looked up to see the judge looking down at her, though she could not see what was going on underneath the judge's cloak. Whatever emotions that Izunami-Yama may have had were sufficiently suppressed.

"You said you possess a talisman." The judge stood up. "You obviously refer to the three talismans of the Holy Grail. Am I correct?"

"...Yes."

"Can you back up this claim that you possess a talisman?" All eyes were on her. "State to me how you know this!"

"...I remember."

The fear in Michiru's face slowly disappeared as she looked up to face the judge. Somehow, she had forgotten in her fear the very thing that had brought her to the netherworld in the first place. She called upon what little was left of herself, and began to visualize those last moments she experienced on Earth.

"We were in Marine Cathedral...in Tokyo." She could feel the wind blowing her hair as she and Uranus landed the helicopter in front of the church. "Eudial had called us there. She said she had the identities of the talisman holders. But when we got there, we were shot at. I was captured...I...remember next being tied up." Michiru's hand went up to her neck. "I remember organ music...then Eudial was laughing...and she was in front of Sailor Uranus, my partner. She shot Uranus, over and over, with guns that were installed into the side panels of the church. And...then told her...she would extract the talisman from _my_ body. But first...she would extract the one that was held in Uranus' body."

She shook her head. Uranus was there, as vivid as Takeshi, her body riddled with injuries as Eudial aimed her heart extractor at Uranus' heart. The words that Eudial spoke, stating that there was no hope for Uranus to survive the shot.

"I lost it. I had to save her." Michiru's voice lowered, anger evinced in her voice as she remembered how desperately she wanted to save her beloved friend. "Those guns shot me, even more than they shot Uranus, until they had all run out of ammunition. But even then, I wouldn't give up. I wouldn't let that woman take Haruka!"

At this, her fists hit the side of the cage, where they were nicked by the sides of the nails once more. But Michiru didn't care. The more she thought of Haruka, of Uranus, the angrier she got. The angrier she got, the guiltier she felt about Takeshi, about Haruka.

But not about herself.

"And that's when Eudial shot me." Michiru clenched her teeth as more blood began to let out from the fresh cuts, and she shook her head again. "I didn't see the talisman, I admit, your Honor, but somehow, I could _feel_ my heart crystal change even as it was taken out of my body. That's when I knew, but I didn't care; we had promised each other that sacrifice was the only way to save the world. That's the truth."

As she finished, she felt a cold chill surround her body. Shivering violently, she looked up to the judge, only to find that the judge had disappeared.

"The court is in recess!" The bailiff's voice came out again. "The judge will be back in a few moments."

At this, the entire courtroom seemed to let out a breath of relief. As if on cue, people began to talk amongst themselves, discussing current events and plans for the weekend. Things of the living world were mentioned, including sports and politics, things that weren't considered within the realm of hellish demons to know. There was the sounds of smacking lips as food was brought out and eaten; there was even the smell of cigarettes from the back row, though one look from the bailiff compelled the smoker to put their stick out. Within seconds, the attitude of the courtroom had become as relaxed as a salon; everyone was obviously taking a break.

But not the Takamakis, who simply looked on with disgust at the defendant. Certainly not the defendant, who could now see the hell she was being condemned to much more clearly.

There was more than just swords, iron nails, and boiling oil in the Avici hell. Underneath the furnace, which thousands were stuffed into, was a boiling hot copper platform. It swung back and forth, pinning a soul to the wall while a giant rock ground them here, flinging a soul into a field where chariots quartered them there. That and more; tongues were ripped out, hearts were dug out from their chambers, the skin was torn off, leaving the muscles to be exposed to the heat.

i My god. /i

The souls who did not land into an area of punishment, but fell off the platform, fell thousands of feet into a distant, thin slice of yellow light, their faces sliding down the wall as they screamed. Michiru remembered well what happened; the souls that fell off would land in flames so hot and so unholy that they literally melted. Not merely melt, but disintegrate and cease to exist.

i ...That's not me. /i

Michiru looked over at Takamaki and shook her head. There were crimes Michiru knew she was guilty of. Being determined, she was guilty. Being cold to others , dedicating herself to a mission that risked lives, she was guilty of that too. But Michiru felt in her heart that nothing she had ever done – in her current and last lives – warranted the fate that Takamaki was trying to foist on her.

i I won't let it be me. /i

Michiru had decided to finally fight, to use what strength she had left to beat off the Avici hell and her fate. She clenched her fists and was ready to speak to the bailiff when a burst of flame suddenly lit up the judge's chair.

"All rise!"

The relaxation was cut off as the judge reappeared. Hastily, the demons all stood, hoping that they were not caught breaking the courtroom rules. Nevertheless, no matter how well the cloaked figures tried to hide what they were doing, the judge gave several in the crowd an extended glare before sitting down.

"You may be seated." The red-skinned officer looked at Michiru. "The judge will now render his verdict."

Michiru didn't respond. She was already standing, and she was looking back at the judge as she waited for her fate. Her fists clenched even more tightly as the minutes passed with complete silence.

"Kaiou Michiru." Michiru's back stiffened as the judge finally addressed the court. "I have reviewed the karmic records of everyone involved in this case as you all spoke. I have also used the Mirror of Retribution to verify your final moments of life, in regards to your story about the talisman. Do you understand what I mean?"

"Yes." For some reading, Michiru could see the mirror – gold plated, the sea and the sea green sign of Neptune flashing from within. "To look into one's soul. To find weaknesses and crimes."

"That is correct." The judge's cloak went down. "I saw a great deal of things."

The judge stopped again, drinking in the silence. Even the howls of the dead outside the courtroom seemed muted.

"I saw the moment which you told the court about, and as I watched I found your story to be...surprising." The judge looked back up at the soldier."I saw the moment which has brought you here – your attack did indeed end up killing Takamaki Takeshi. But alongside that, what I saw in the Mirror of Retribution was a great deal of instances where you could have dealt a victim death...but instead restored their lives back to them, as you said you did. I saw what you had to fight, and if my feelings are correct, we will be seeing many people come here because you are not there to save them."

"...Your Honor..."

"Also," The judge held their hand up. "Because you had stated your defense in a way I could sympathize with, I was able to give you the benefit of the doubt and overview all the instances of your chivalry as well as Takamaki's death...including the instance where you tried to protect your partner even at the cost of your own life."

Finishing their statement, the judge suddenly snapped their fingers, which made a sound like clapping thunder. The bailiff nodded, and stepped forward.

"Satan, unbind the defendant."  
"...What...?" Takomaki's eyes widened as the cage swung open on its own accord and the bailiff grabbed Michiru's bound wrists. "You...you're letting her go!"

"Yes. It has been written that I am clearing her of all the charges." The judge pointed to the bailiff again. "Use your power to cleanse the defendant's soul of her injuries. She shall be returned to her body immediately to resume her life."  
"You...you would give this _sinner_ a future in the living world!" Takomaki's eyes began to fill once more with tears. "After what she did to me and my son, you're letting her _go_!"  
"What she did to your son is terrible, Takamaki-san. There is no argument. But the defendant has made a compelling argument in her defense, has shown conscience towards the act and convinced me of the complexity of the situation," the judge sighed "Though murder is a heinous crime, so to is being passive in times of crisis such as this. Kaiou-san's actions will be marked on the karmic register and noted as involuntary murder, but I cannot sentence to Avici hell someone whose intent was and is not purely malicious."

"Your Honor...!"

"Placing the greater good of the world before the good of an individual is not always a crime. This girl's heart is obviously pure, as evinced by the appearance of a talisman, and her intentions were noble from the start. She did not realize that your son would die."  
"_Your Honor!_"  
"Also, I cannot condemn the defendant for your death, Takomaki-san. You ultimately chose to commit suicide; the defendant did not personally force you towards that act."

Michiru took a deep breath as the shackles disappeared, even as she weighed the words in her mind. As the shackles disappeared, so to did the cuts from the thorns; the bloodied lines shrunk until they disappeared from her wrists. Behind her, Takamaki wept, holding her son tightly.

"Demon...!" Takeshi merely kept staring as his mother became hysterical towards the green-haired girl. "You demon! You bitch! I won't let you get away with this!"

"Takamaki-san!" The judge pointed their gavel at the pair. "You are dismissed!"

Without warning, a ring of flames surrounded mother and son, engulfing them. Michiru turned to hear the mother's screams as she dissipated into nothing, her soul transported back to purgatory for her suicide. The last thing that could be seen within the circle, the only thing Michiru ended up seeing, was Takeshi's lifeless eyes, which seemed to gleam even after the rest of his body had disappeared. They seemed to bore right through Michiru's body, condemning her even as she was being exonerated.

Crossing her arms over her tattered dress, Michiru could not stop staring at the spot even after the fire died.

"As I was saying...Kaiou Michiru shall be cleared of all charges. I advise, however, that the defendant watch herself and search her conscience next time." The red eyes flashed briefly at Michiru's turned head as the judge of the netherworld spoke again. "This death was accidental, but the taste of blood can be deadly no matter how it was acquired. You will not be dealt with as leniently the next time you are accused of such crimes as you stood trial for today!"

_"Pluto!"  
"Talismans..."  
"Wake..."_

The voices of the living suddenly echoed through Neptune's mind as the gavel began to come down. The redness of the courtroom began to swim in front of her eyes as she heard the cries of young girls, the cries of fellow soldiers.

"Case dismissed!"

Like a peel of thunder, the gavel came down with a slam, and instantly the ground rumbled. The earth seemed to open up in front of everyone, and the screams of the damned filled Michiru's ears as she began to fall into blackness, into the eternal darkness.

She closed her eyes. This time, there was nothing under her feet to stop her.

Nothing to save her...

"_Neptune_!"

At the voice Sailor Neptune's eyes opened up once more. There was was nothing, then a soft, hazy light, then blue. Then, in front of her materialized Uranus, staring in shock, and a new soldier whose name and face she know but did not quite remember. Then there were the other soldiers, their faces staring blankly at the scene before them. Eudial in the background, gun in tow, shouting angrily. A gold-plated mirror right in front of her eyes. Heart crystals floating in the air.

The Holy Grail, shining brightly, lighting up the darkness of the church.

"Neptune."

Neptune could not help but shudder as she felt her heart crystal return to her chest. The sound of the gavel on steel still echoed through her ears, the dead eyes of Takamori Takeshi still stared at her. The tortured wails of the damned, the admonishments of a dead mother, the stares of the baby dragon still filled her heart with dread. Maggots still crawled over her legs in that dark holding cell.

She was exonerated by a court of law, but not by her own crawling conscience.

* * *

_Note: The hell Fengdu is inspired by the real Fengdu, the hell in both Chinese mythology and Buddhist transformation texts. Punishments mentioned were real punishments meted out to souls, and the Avici hell was reserved for the worst sinners. Consulting wikipedia is a good start to learning about Fengdu and the 18 Levels of Hell, in order to better understand this background._

_Story is copyright 2006 by this author. Plagarism will be dealt with by the sixth judge of hell, and all guilty parties will have their tongues ripped out and hung upside down by their private parts by the appropriate authorities. Thank you. _


End file.
